- Irene: Did I ever tell you of my escape from the Soviets?
- Achille Weber: You've told me about it at least eleven times, and every time it was different.
- Irene: Well, I made several escapes. I am always making escapes, Achille. When I worry about you and your career, I have to run away from the terror of my own thoughts. So I amuse myself by studying the faces of the people I see. Just ordinary, casual, dull people. That little English couple for instance - I was watching them during dinner, sitting there close together, holding hands. And I saw him in his nice, smart British uniform shooting a little pistol at a huge tank. And the tank rolls over him. And his fine, strong body that was so full of the capacity for ecstasy... is a mass of mashed flesh and bones. A smear of purple blood, like a stepped-on snail. But before the moment of death, he consoles himself by thinking, "thank God she is safe. She is bearing the child I gave her. And he will live to see a better world." But I know where she is. She is under a house that has been racked by an air raid. She is as dead as he is. But he, he died in action against the enemy gloriously. But she died in a cellar, not so very gloriously. There will be many who will die this way in this war, won't there Achille?
- [he does not respond]
- Irene: You don't say anything! Probably you are bored. But I like to think about these things, Achille. And it makes me so proud to think that I am so close to you, who makes all this possible.
- Achille Weber: That's all very interesting, my dear. But before you waste too much sympathy on these little people like your English friends, just ask yourself this: why shouldn't they die? And who are the greater criminals - those who sell the instruments of death or those who buy them and use them? It is they who make war seem noble and heroic, and what does it all amount to? Mistrust of the motives of everyone else! A dog-in-the-manger defence of all they've got, greed for the other fellow's possessions! Oh, I assure you, Irene, for such little people, the deadliest weapons are the most merciful.
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- Irene: Harry, do you realize the whole world has gone to war? The whole world!
- Harry: I realize it, but don't ask me why. I've stopped trying to figure it out.
- Irene: I know why it is. It's just to kill us - you and me. Because we are the little people. And for us, the deadliest weapons are the most merciful.
- Harry: Easy...
- Irene: I've never cared before, but now I want to live.
- Harry: So do I, but if we don't, let's hope we make a fast exit.
- Irene: Then together.
- Harry: [explosion from a large bomb nearby] Nice try buddy, but you muffed it!
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- Irene: My father was old. The hardships of that terrible journey had broken his body. But his spirit was strong. His spirit, that is Russia.
- Irene: He lay there in that little boat. And he looked up at me. Never can I forget his face. So thin. So white. So beautiful in the starlight.
- Irene: And he said to me, 'Irena, little daughter'. And then... he died.
- Irene: For four days I was alone with his body. Sailing through the storms of the Black Sea. I had no food. No water. I was in agony from the violent wounds of the Bolshevikii. I knew I must die.
- Irene: And then... an American cruiser rescued me. May Heaven bless those good men!
- Harry: Ahem. Excuse me Madame. But it seems to me that the last time you told me about your escape it was different.
- Irene: Well! I made several escapes.
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- Harry: [to the waiter] Seems to me everyone would be happier in Europe if they learned how to make a decent cup of coffee.
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- Irene: I am so happy for you.
- Achille Weber: Happy? Why?
- Irene: All this wonderful death and destruction everywhere. And you promoted it.
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- Harry: Say, what are your plans for supper?
- Irene: Oh, Mr. Van, are you inviting me?
- Harry: Well, don't look at me like that. I'm only offering to buy you a cup of coffee because I appreciate your kind motives in busting up our act tonight.
- Irene: Oh, that's very sweet of you, Mr. Van. I'll get dressed, right away. I'll be proud to be seen in a restaurant with you.
- Harry: Wait till you see the restaurant.
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- Irene: Do you think we'll ever see each other again?
- Harry: Maybe we will and maybe we won't. You can't predict anything in show business.
- Irene: Or in any other kind of a life, I suppose.
- Harry: No, I guess not. But, I'll be thinking about you, babe.
- Irene: Oh, I'm sure you will.
- Harry: Yes, and as a matter of fact, I'd like to know that - you're thinking about me a little bit, too.
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- Donald Navadel: Evidently, Mr. Van, you're not fully aware of the present international situation!
- Harry: Well, I'm aware that the international situation is always regrettable. What's wrong now?
- Donald Navadel: Haven't you been reading the papers?
- Harry: In Bulgaria and Yugoslavia? No.
- Donald Navadel: We're on the verge of a war.
- Harry: What? Another one!
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- Harry: The world you live in isn't a world of facts and figures, it's a world of dreams. Maybe that's what I like about you Irene. You're so beautifully phony.
- Irene: And maybe you're wrong my darling. Maybe we two cheap people, with our cheap lives, maybe we're the only ones in this crazy world who are real.
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- Irene: I told you then that I wasn't everybody. It's true; I'm nobody. But I learned it was no use telling the truth to people whose life was a whole lie.
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- Quillery: While you sit here eating and drinking, their planes dropped fifty thousand kilos of bombs on innocent people. Heavens knows how many were killed; how much of life and beauty is forever destroyed. And you sit here eating and drinking with them, the murderers. It was their planes from the very field down there. Assassins!
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- Harry: [last line domestic version] Hey, over here boys! Over here! See the big show. See the greatest aggregation of talent in the world.
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- Irene: Did I ever tell you of my escape from the Soviets?
- Achille Weber: You've told me about it at least 11 times and every time it was different.
- Irene: Well, I made several escapes.
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- Harry: [to the waiter] Get me a scotch, and, uh, put ice in it. If you haven't got any ice, go out and scoop up some of that beautiful white snow.
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- Jimmy Barzek: Yeah, that's show business.
- Harry: Oh, yes, yes. The gay, carefree world of entertainment.
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- Irene: I have something rather important to tell you.
- Harry: What is it, babe?
- Irene: Do you mind if I sit down?
- Harry: Well, as a matter of fact I do, but, anyway, have a seat. And if you see a bottle of champagne standing around, open it up. Now, what's on your mind?
- Irene: I want to confess.
- Harry: You'll find a church right around the corner.
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- Irene: I've been watching your act, Mr. Van. I couldn't help picking up some of the code. I mean, your tone of voice when you say - concentrate. There are subtle changes that mean different things.
- Harry: Where did you learn words like subtle?
- Irene: Oh, I haven't always been an acrobat, Mr. Van. I attended the University in Vienna... with Freud, Jung, all the great teachers.
- Harry: From the University in Vienna to the El Dorado in Omaha. Some jump!
- Irene: Yes. Ha-ha. That's been my whole life, today the mountaintops - tomorrow the Dead Sea.
- Harry: Yeah, I guess you're right, sister.
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- Harry: I have a great admiration for you.
- Irene: Oh, you like my electrical personality, huh?
- Harry: No, nothing as obvious as that. I think you have a very remarkable brain!
- Irene: So, you noticed that too, hmm?
- Harry: I also have a very remarkable brain.
- Irene: Yeah, and a very remarkable way of talking for a girl who makes her living swinging by her teeth.
- Harry: Why, I was born for excitement, adventure, danger. I've had all the - I'll have a lot more before I come to a violent death.
- Irene: So you've even got that arranged.
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- Irene: Do you know that song? It's Kak Stranno - its Russian. Oh, its so lovely! It takes me back so far to the Winter Palace in Petersburg. La-la-la La-la-la Kak Stranno. That means, How Strange. It tells such a sad, beautiful story about two people, who meet and fall in love for one exquisite moment - and then they part. Like ships that pass in the night. Mmm-mmm-mmm-mmm Mmm-mmm-mmm KaK Stranno - How Strange.
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- Harry: You know, Irene, I've met a lot of dames in my time. And most of 'em are so dumb you have to talk to 'em in sign language.
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- Donald Navadel: Mr. Van, I advise you to be careful how you talk.
- Harry: Why? I'm an American citizen! I can say what I please.
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- Harry: Next, Miss Edna Creesh. She's as good as gold and twice as tough.
- Les Blondes - Edna: Hi ya, toots!
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- Harry: Well, I guess I might as well register. I'll need three double rooms, two girls to a room. And a single, for me - adjoining. I promised their mothers I'd always be within ear shot.
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- Harry: [to Les Blondes] Alright, alright. Finish your drinks and come on upstairs. I'm gonna give you all a bath.
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- Harry: Well, now, listen to me, you dames, you may as well know right now, the act is bankrupt. I got barely enough to get us to Geneva. So don't run up any bills around this dump.
- Les Blondes - Shirley: Say, Harry, there's a hair dresser. Can't I get a finger wave?
- Harry: No!
- Les Blondes - Bebe: Can we go ski?
- Harry: And risk breaking those pretty legs?
- Les Blondes - Edna: But it's healthy.
- Harry: Yeah, but you're not sick. Those gams of yours are my bread and butter.
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- Irene: But your place is rrrreally charming. I must tell everyone in Paris about it.
- Donald Navadel: We are rather proud of it.
- Irene: There is something about this design. It suggests, eh, an amusing kind of horror. It is like somebody's tomb, isn't it?
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- Dr. Waldersee: Why should I save people who don't want to be saved? So they can go out and exterminate each other?
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