- MSgt. Ernest G. Bilko: The National Indemnity Insurance Co., $500, accident?
- Pvt. Duane Doberman: Five years ago, I was hit by a cab.
- MSgt. Ernest G. Bilko: [Hugging him] Good boy!
- MSgt. Ernest G. Bilko: Let's see, you won the first five hands... That means they gave you the Australian Deal.
- Pvt. Fielding Zimmerman: What's that mean, sarge?
- MSgt. Ernest G. Bilko: From down under.
- [Mimes dealing from the bottom of the deck]
- Steve: Why, I bet we even went to the same school!
- MSgt. Ernest G. Bilko: Goosenheimer Business College.
- Jean, Steve: [In unison] Goosenheimer Business College!
- Pvt. Duane Doberman: [to card sharp] All right, now listen up: get out of my hotel, and never come back!
- MSgt. Ernest G. Bilko: When he says, "Get out of my-" What do you mean, "my hotel"?
- Pvt. Duane Doberman: I just met the owner out in the hall, and he sold me the whole thing for $500.